24 March 2010

Cheap wine lady makes no excuses for not updating. She drinks wine. Sometimes she writes. Sometimes she savors the moment w shares it with no one but her inner child.

[Sauvignon Blanc. Free from hotel. Cannot recall brand]
This wine was so cheap, it was free.

Cheap wine lady is a return customer to a certain hotel in Kampala. Kindly, very kindly, said hotel offers return customers a free bottle (yes, bottle!) of wine. Cheap wine lady has two such bottles offered (since she left and came back in the span of 10 days). What a gift! She worries about the unspoken invitation to chat that a lady with a bottle to herself may extend to the many overweight, middle-aged South African men that frequent the hotel, but goes ahead with the Sauvignon Blanc because it is warm out, because she is ordering chicken, because she assumed it would be South African and their SB exports are ok (unlike their male exports) and because she damn well can do what she wants, thank you very much.

It should also be known that cheap wine lady has not had a drink in around 10 days. TEN DAYS. You read right. Let's just say she was eagerly awaiting the first pour.

Well. Well. Well. If cheap wine lady had an emoticon for disappointment it would be placed here <>. This wine was like hooking up with a 20 year old because he was cute and half way through remembering why you preferred older men; sloppy (why on earth is this SB as syrupy as Ugandan honey?), inexperienced and no staying power (if you want it to work for me, darling, allow your flavors to rest on my tongue a little longer), no dynamism or creativity (the wine is so thin you could tear it with your pinky, buck up, you don't have to throw me around but you could at least not buckle under my weight). Unlike a 20 year old, this wine was sweet, sweet, sweet, a wannabe bloody Riesling.

Cheap wine lady leaves 3/4 of the bottle and returns to her room, sadly wiping a tear from her eye. Yes, even cheap wine lady has feelings.

So there you have it. Despite Ms. Jackson's proclamation to the contrary, the best things in life are not free. OK Janet?